5 Ways to Find Positivity When Life’s Struggles Take Over


Life has a weird way of beating you down. Most of the time it’s successful. Sometimes you find it very difficult to make through the daily grind without crying or finding other ways to take out your frustration. You’re not alone. I want you to know, however, that no matter how much life gets under your skin, there is a way to stay positive. And most importantly, there is a way to use the positivity to your advantage to move your life forward.


On March 9, 2018, I left a very good job. This job had very good people and my outlook within the company was quite bright. I won’t get into the details about why things didn’t work out, but I will tell you that it was unexpected, disappointing and incredibly frustrating. Since that day, I’ve worked my hardest to stay positive and keep marching forward, even when life seemingly has some other plans. Some days are more difficult than others, admittedly, but I pride myself on my ability to stay positive, my ability to know my worth, and my ability to trust in myself and my abilities.

Since March 9th, the personal struggle has been exhausting for me at times, but I am constantly reminded that there are so many of you out there who are in the same position as I am: not knowing what comes next and being frightened by the uncertainty. So I’ve decided to share with you five things that I focus on daily to help me stay positive and march forward to the next section of my life.

1 – Give Yourself a Challenge

I decided late last year that I was going to go alcohol-free in 2018. As of me writing this sentence, I am proudly seven months sober. It’s a fun personal challenge that I get to focus on every time I am out with friends or family.

Find yourself a challenge to focus on. It obviously doesn’t have to be for one year like me, but if you find a personal challenge that you can be proud of, when you succeed, the positive feeling and self-confidence in yourself will bring out a natural happiness that is hard to replicate elsewhere.


2 – Learn and Become Better

Lord knows that I have made so many mistakes in the past. Financially, emotionally, physically… c’mon, I had blonde hair for two years of my life… and now I’m completely bald because of it. 😉

Take the experiences you go through and learn from them. Don’t brush them to the side or hide them. Whether the experience was good or bad, it’s important that you use it as an educational tool to become a better person. Take what doesn’t work and learn from it. Take what works and grow.

3 – Surround Yourself with Positive People

Who do you spend most of your time with? Do these people spread positivity or negativity? I am a firm believer that moods are contagious. If you surround yourself with negative people and bullies, then it’ll be easy for you to stoop down to their level.

But if you make an effort to ignore those negative mindsets and surround yourself with positive energy, then it’ll be easier for you to draw inspiration from that energy and use the positivity to better yourself.

With everything happening in the world right now, it’s easy to succumb to the negativity. Be bigger than that. You deserve the smile. Surround yourself with positive people and spread positivity yourself. Positivity is the best contagion.


4 – Find Something You Love to Do

For me, it’s theater and working out. These are two things that I can focus on when real life gets me down. It’s like a temporary escape. It doesn’t solve my problems, but these things become therapeutic in so many ways for me.

Find something YOU love to do. Maybe it’s going to movies or reading a book or cooking. Find it and focus on it.

5 – Be Kind and Smile

I have a challenge for you. Over the next week, go out of your way to be kind to someone. Or simply smile at someone or give them a compliment. When you are kind and when you can make someone else smile, you’ll be making their day better and yours.

BONUS TIP – Listen to Positive Music!

Right now, I am obsessed with Pray for the Wicked, the new album from Panic! At The Disco. It’s full of really positive, upbeat and fun tunes. My three favorite songs on the album are “Dancing’s Not A Crime”, “The Overpass”, and “Silver Lining”. Check it out if you get a moment… or find a new album or favorite album that you enjoy listening to that lifts your spirits.


I hope this all helps you. Even just a little. Everyone is different, and every situation is different, so I can only speak from my perspective and my experience. But hopefully you can take something positive from this and apply it to your life or share it with someone who may need it.

I would love to hear your comments and feedback about this piece. Feel free to leave a comment below or contact me privately.


Love, Ky

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