In theater world, there is this weird perception that if you’re single, you’re supposed to be (or are) unhappy. Sure, we single people bitch and moan a little too often about our inability to find someone willing to turn that stage kiss into an “I do” kiss… or at least a “Netflix and chill” situation… but hey, cut us some slack.
I do, however, have a message for all of the single people in the world of theater…
In the world of theater, we sing, dance, and act out love every rehearsal and performance. Love is the basis for every single theatrical production that we do (except for CATS… nobody knows what that shit is about). Since we are surrounded by the notion of love every day, it is easy for singles to get a little down about it. And it doesn’t help that all of our friends seem to get engaged, married, and have babies on the same exact day… (Wwwwhyyyyyyy Goddddd?! Whyyyyy todayyyyy?!)
But hey, single folk, lucky for us, there are many people in the theatrical world that live fulfilling single lives and, #LetsBeReal, we all know people in theater that settle into the wrong relationship… (Burrs and Queenie, anyone?)
It’s okay to be single! Here are five reasons why:
You have the ability to try something new and out of the ordinary
When you’re single, you can whatever you want, whenever you want to do it. You can do the shows you want, you can hang out late with your casts after rehearsal, among other things. Yeah, when you’re in a strong relationship with someone, you can do all that stuff too, but if you’re with someone who doesn’t share the same interests are you, you may feel a little more limited than you’d like to feel.
It’s easier to learn about other people
If you have the freedom to date, you can create a mental list of what you want and what you don’t want in a relationship. Not only will you be able to discover things about other people (some of whom you may not have thought about giving a chance before), but you’d also learn a lot about yourself.
Never view a dating experience as a waste of time. Fine, your date was more Benny/Mimi during La Vie Boheme than Curly/Laurie on a surrey with a fringe on top… but that’s okay! If it didn’t bring you what you wanted, it showed you what you don’t want. #OnToTheNextOne
It proves that you aren’t someone who lowers their standards
In the world of theater, there’s this assumption that if you’re single, it means that you can’t find someone – but in all actuality, that may not be the case. A lot of us are just smart enough to wait for that right person to enter this crazy musical we call Life. Shit, some of us single folk should be giving ourselves a pat on the back for staying committed to our own happiness as opposed to jumping into something that will most likely bring temporary pleasure, and future pain.
Cuts down on the drama
Sit back, relax, grab your popcorn, and watch your cast mates get into relationships that shouldn’t be relationships. Performers don’t just love drama on the stage and screen, they love drama in general. (Oof-oy… college.) We all see the drama, now it’s a matter of deciding whether you want to be a part of it or not. #LetsBeReal, negative relationships don’t just go away… they linger. Enjoy your single life, stay positive and cut back on the potential emotional baggage that could be carried over into your next relationship. (If you actually have popcorn right now… please share it with me… I’m hungry.)
You get to be YOU
YOU are awesome. In theater, many people love to talk shit about other people. It’s just how they roll, it’s how they release. Always know that no matter what kind of person you are, people are always going to have something to say, whether it’s negative or positive. Theater people always have an opinion, and they always think they’re “in the know”. Most likely, they don’t know the true story and they’re just spewing overexxagerated nonsense in hopes of creating a good story to tell other castmates at a cast party… but guess what? IT DOESN’T MATTER. When you’re single, you get to worry about YOU and you get to do what YOU want to do. Stick with the friends that you trust, stay positive, and BE YOU. Don’t let any other person change that.
In the end…
…please remind yourself that it can be hard finding the right relationship. Happy, healthy relationships don’t just pop up High School Musical-style (Though I do miss Troy and Gabriella… said the straight guy…) Some people find it sooner than others… there is no deadline for love. It can happen anywhere at any time (hopefully during curtain call or something).
The theater world is full of people who feel as though they are in negative relationships, and are unable to leave that relationship for some reason. THAT is worse than being single.
When you feel lonely, stay positive and push through. A great relationship takes time, and the right person will enhance your life, not restrain it. So continue to chase your passions and one day you’ll find your very own Tony/Maria love story… minus the whole death part…
Keep an eye out for Kyrus’ new web series Too Much Time w/ Ky, premiering this month on his website.
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