#lifeofky – My Life As An Actor – Day 15: “The Light at the End of a Very Dark Tunnel”

+Woke up at 7am. Ate Fruit Loops and watched Good Morning America. I took my shower the night before, so I only had to freshen up before I left out of the house at 8:30am.

+For some reason, I had the urge to drive to work today as opposed to taking the train. Come to find out, it was with good reason. Once I arrived in New Brunswick, I checked my NJTransit alerts, and come to find out, the train I would have taken at 8:31am from Hamilton was running 20 minutes behind schedule. #scoreoneforKy

+Today we rehearsed “Peacemaker” all day at GSP. My juggling is coming along. It is getting better. Maybe I’ll post a video by the end of the week. It has been about two days and I have been teaching myself how to juggle. I have never juggled before in my life, but I feel confident that I will be ready for my big juggling debut in late-September.

+Today, during lunch, I signed my EMC contract for “Getting the Band Back Together” at GSP. Nothing is super-official yet, but it will be by the end of this week hopefully. Brad, Rachelle, Patti, and myself are very excited to be potentially understudying this awesome new musical at GSP!

+I got my GSP schedule for September … oh boy … it’s going to be a crazy/busy month for me 😦 Just when I thought things were going to lighten up a little … eh, it’s okay, October will be here before we know it and I’ll be able to rest then… I am hoping :/

+GSP finished at 6pm and I drove straight to Kelsey to rehearse Forum. It was our first night of tech for the show. Since we are the opening show of the season, we get two weeks in the theater to tech. (I did the same thing last year for Pippin.)

+Our run went fairly well. We have the normal kinks to work out, and I know what I need to do to improve my performance, but we’re definitely getting there.

+I came home, ate a late-ish dinner, watched Under the Dome, and after I finish this blog, I am heading to bed since I have another very long day tomorrow. I have off Friday night and Saturday night … I CANNOT WAIT … I just want to lay down, rest, and do nothing…

+Sunday, I am singing the National Anthem at the Camden Riversharks game, and at night it is my fantasy football draft. (Gotta prep for that.)


I am still awaiting the day that I can wake up and all of the worries that have been plaguing me the past six months would go away. I am working my butt off day in and day out to take care of my life and myself back on my feet.

You see, my main problem is that I beat myself up so much … too much at times. I have grown more grey hair over these six months than anybody that I’ve known, and I just can’t wait for it to just go away.

But as I go through life, taking everything day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute … I always sit back and listen to Luther Vandross singing “it’s alright….it’s alright…..oooo…. it’s alright, it’s alright….”

You honestly have no idea how much those lyrics mean to me. They calm me down. They are the last thing I listen to before I close my eyes at night. Those lyrics remind me to to never lose hope … no matter what is going on. Bad things and bad events can easily discourage me, especially when I let negative thoughts take over my mind.

I must always remind myself to only listen to the positive people and only listen to the people who love me, believe in me, and support me. I cannot let negative thoughts or actions influence me, no matter how difficult it can be sometimes…



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